Jesus has become my reality. Life is filled with stages. At each stage, as a daughter, as a student, as a wife, as a mother, as a grandmother, as a teacher, as a retired teacher – I wondered – Now what does life hold for me? I wondered how I would fill the new role, what would it take? Along the way I had glimpses of The Reality. Then this physical reality dropped on us – a caregiver for my husband with the diagnosis of Dementia (Lewy Body).
The bravado, the ‘I can do it’, was stripped away from me and I felt undone. No amount of studying or preparation could ready me for this reality. It was then that one of my favorite songs became a daily prayer… Just a Closer Walk with You. Just a closer walk with Thee, Grant it Jesus, is my plea, Daily walking close to Thee, Let it be, dear Lord, let it be…
This diagnosis was not in my plans, but it is in God’s plans. As I ponder why, I realize I can’t do this alone. I need family and a host of helpers who around me. I need a closer walk with Jesus. Even in my 80’s, I am a work in progress. I am still learning. I am learning what it is to serve, to put another’s needs before what I think I need at the moment. I am learning to trust my husband, of almost 64 years, to the care of others.
As one season fades into another, and comes again, I watch my years advance and my body weaken. Each season, I learn to trust him more. His Word gives me strength. The kindness and love and giving from others bolsters my will to continue each day. My reality moves over and in its place is the Reality of Jesus.
Listening to the messages from our minister on I Am…a new creation, a servant, an adopted child, clothed in Christ, in Christ, a creature – fearfully and wonderfully made. Then this last week – I am weak! This is my reality…I am weak! Then I read 2 Corinthians 12:10 and know with Apostle Paul – For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong!
True strength comes from the reality of the love Jesus gave us by being sin for us – on the cross. He put aside his life with his Father in Heaven, and came down as a tiny helpless baby. Think of the trust He had and the love He has for those born before and those who come after.
So many heart-aches in the world of so many people. I remember my many weaknesses and I rejoice that I can be made strong in Him, only to serve and glorify Him. I wonder sometimes how He can love me.
One of the ways God speaks to me is His Word with the Love and Peace and Joy pouring from each page. Another way are through the melodies of faith with lyrics such as – Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus, And He Walks with Me and He Talks with Me and He tells me I am His Own, Jesus Loves Me, This I know, Amazing Love, How Sweet the Sound, His Eye is On the Sparrow and I Know He Watches Me and Going Home, Going Home, I’m just Going Home. It’s not far, just close by, I’m just Going Home.
I give thanks to God for the blessings He pours upon me each day, and the security I feel in His love. I give thanks to Him for those He places around me to encourage and to teach me. I give thanks for the opportunity to be alive, for each breath, for each blessing God places in my life. The longer I live, the more the blessings of God around me are not bought but experienced – such as the drops of rain, a stray butterfly, the wind rippling through the leaves playing a silent melody of praise. And the innocent laughter of children.
And more. This is my Reality. Then I can serve one more week, one more day and one more moment – because of Him – because He is faithful.
Then I hear this song, and it is my prayer and my plea for my reality:
Give me faith to trust what You say, That You’re good, and Your love is great. I’m broken inside, I give You my life. I may be weak, but Your Spirit’s strong in me. My flesh may fail, but My God You never will.
Holiness is Christ in me…Jesus is my reality. Where sin runs deep Your grace is more, Where grace is found, is where You are. Where You are, Lord I am free. Holiness is Christ in me, Yes, where You are, Lord I am free, Holiness is Christ in me.
Holiness is Christ in me. Jesus is my reality….the words penetrate my heart with understanding. Going Home, it’s not far….I’m just going home.
† – Even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. Ephesians 1:4
† – My eyes are always on the Lord, for he rescues me from the traps of my enemies. Psalm 25:15
† – That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong. – 2 Corinthians 12:10
† – But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God. John 1:12-13
† – And this is the confidence that we have before him: that whenever we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in regard to whatever we ask, then we know that we have the requests that we have asked from him. I John 5:14-15
† – For the law possesses a shadow of the good things to come but not the reality itself, and is therefore completely unable, by the same sacrifices offered continually, year after year, to perfect those who come to worship. Hebrews 10:1
Give Me Faith – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_Voi3JM8ZA